|Source: Wikimedia Commons|
The New York Times' Josh Barro fired up his political rivals a couple weeks ago with this tweet:
references to gay Hitler.
On the one hand, it's not difficult to see how people get the false impression. "Stamp them out" and "ruthlessly" are hardly tempered phrasing, and anyone using such words should expect to enrage opponents. But the status of the two sides in this ideological conflict have always been asymmetrical. Queer individuals have been consistently maltreated, brutalized, oppressed, economically disadvantaged, psychologically damaged, and more by those who harbor bias against them. There is no comparable assault of any kind to the other side, and there never will be. So any intense language must be understood in this context.
Still, those like Erick Erickson of Red State seem to think that Barro has crossed the bounds of civility that should be allowed in debate. Their own forays into ridiculous caricature aside, one can see why Erickson and his ilk feel this way. Honest and open discussion are only possible when both sides can speak respectfully to each other, so we have good reason to be polite and courteous to those with whom we have even profound moral and political disagreements.
This argument, however, only takes us up to a certain point. Some ideas are now considered too retrograde to be even worth giving a decent hearing. We just have no need to consider the ideas of those who think slavery should still be legal, though undoubtedly some of these people exist. And I would feel entirely comfortable laughing at someone in the face if they suggested that women's participation in the democratic process was up to debate. As Barro explained, this is how we should start to act toward those with oppressive views on sexuality and gender:
Erickson, and those who agree with him, will never concede this point. But that's just fine, it's not meant to be conceded. The point is that those who espouse anti-LGBT views are becoming irrelevant, and are not worth the effort of civility. Barro's audience is those who already agree with him on the substantive issue. He argues that, as a matter of strategy, we ought to focus on creating a climate in which airing anti-LGBT views would be embarrassing and worthy of ridicule.
Civility is only ever required of a movement when changing hearts and minds is a pressing and important goal. Since countless polls and demographic data suggest that the US is well on its way to becoming far more accepting of LGBT citizens, there's much less need for public figures like Barro to be measured and conciliatory. We are not far, it would seem, from a time when discriminatory views based on sexual orientation and gender identity are virtually historical relics, as The Onion once imagined. If polite and inclusive dialogue is no longer seen as necessary, this is a strong indication that society has made significant progress on these matters.
Another positive sign is the shift in rhetoric on the other side of the debate. It's pretty rare to hear sustained arguments against marriage equality these days, and there's even less discussion of the moral failings of being gay in mainstream sources. Rather, the proponents of discriminatory views and policies are much more likely to defend their right to hold such views (which I have argued is meaningless anyway) instead of providing reasons to think that such views are correct.
This supports several interpretations. First, social conservatives feel the need to play the victim in this area, which those who are winning an argument rarely do. Second, they realize on some level that their own arguments are pretty weak or unsupported, and they are therefore reluctant to express them. Third, and relatedly, they perceive that their own arguments would make them come off as bigoted and and outdated, which indicates that society at large is not that sympathetic to their position.
From my perspective, I am generally willing to engage to some extent with those who I think are pretty radically misguided. I enjoy argument for its own sake, and I like to do my best to meet people where they are coming from. And I think you can encounter some interesting and relevant ideas even when dredging up long settled debates. But with limited time and energy, there is certainly much I am not willing entertain.
We are an improved society when particular questions are left off the table. If Barro and I are right, the question of whether or not queer citizens should be regarded with same respect as everyone else is swiftly becoming one of those we need not dwell on. Contra J. S. Mill, we do not need to keep around objectors to every moral position in an effort to stave on complacency. There are many other important moral questions that demand our attention. Societies should be judged on what they take for granted.